Every time I signed on, I was hit by a barrage of creepy messages. He's Jon that he's been immortalized in his own playing card. No online dating profile in the world is comprehensive enough to highlight every person's peccadillo, or anticipate the inane biases that each of us lugs around.
"Dem gurl u so foine, iwud lik veru much for me nd u to be marry n procreate." Or "your legs do look strong." So when I saw an IM from a guy named Jon that said, "You should go out with me :)" I was relieved. Jon was thin and tall, dressed in a hedge fund uniform with pale skin and pierced ears. Jon had bought us tickets for a one-man show based on serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer's life story. The next day I Googled my date and a wealth of information flowed into my browser. Just like you're obligated to mention you're divorced or have a kid in your online profile, shouldn't someone also be required to disclose any indisputably geeky world championship titles? There's no snapshot in the world that can account for our snap judgments.
We started talking about normal stuff—family, work, college. And then he casually mentioned that he played , that strategic collectible card game involving wizards and spells and other detailed geekery.
Maybe your husband is going quiet and you’d like to know why…Get a real perspective from a guy who knows “more than a little” about men and women. Who won’t down-play the answer to make you feel better.Get my gut response to any and all questions which are reasonable and preferably direct. I help them to find their attractive self and I even advise them, “ahem ahem” once and a while to play a somewhat “innocent” role, to attract and date the women they want the most.() I have this problem and I’m hoping you can help me out. The fact is, my “Nice Guy Approach” is taking off and men everywhere are learning how to “get” you. You might feel I’m teaching men how to manipulate you. It's about a girl judging a boy because he's a nerd (like so many of us! But that's the point: Judging people on shallow stuff is human nature, and the magic and absurdity of online dating is how immediately and directly it throws that into relief. "I'm preparing for a tournament this weekend." Strike two. "I've met all my best friends through ." Strike three. Eventually I even felt a little bit bad that I didn't know shit about the game.
One person's Magic is another person's fingernail biting, and no profile in the world is deep enough to account for that. Here was a guy who had dedicated a good chunk of his life to mastering . You'll think you've found a normal bearded guy with a job, only to end up sharing goat cheese with a guy who takes you to a one-man show based on Jeffrey Dahmer's life story.
Two weeks into my online dating experiment, OKCupid had broken me down. I later found out that Jon infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates with at least two other people I sort of know, including one of my co-workers. Maybe I'm an OKCupid asshole for calling it that way.
It was like the online equivalent to hanging out alone in a dark, date-rapey bar. This guy isn't just some professional who dabbled in card games at a tender age. Maybe I'm shallow for not being able to see past Jon's world title. But there's a larger point here: that judging people on shallow stuff is human nature; one person's Magic is another person's fingernail biting, or sports obsession, or verbal tic.
You might even feel some of those guys are using the information to use you and date lots of different women – only to hurt you in the end.
ere’s my problem – women read my advice all the time and they like it.
They spoke up and asked personal questions so they too can benefit from my nice guys approach.